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Saturday, December 26, 2015

After Christmas Post

December 26th today.  Christmas is over for another year, & we have nothing on the calendar today.  Nice!  So I got to go hiking with a friend of mine this morning.  There was hardly anyone on the trail but us & a few deer.  

The week leading up to Christmas Eve & Christmas was the usual whirlwind of buying, wrapping, trying to make last minute gifts(that didn't work out).  Then seeing family, eating, eating & more eating.  Unwrapping things of course, paper & toys everywhere, & it's all over in the blink of an eye.

I know I'm getting up there in my years, because I'm continually amazed at how fast the years go by now.  Anyway, here are some of our memories from the day.  Now onto 2016!

The dogs got a doggie cake pop, but Chewie doesn't like to share
Pretty excited over pajamas
New American Girl Doll pajamas
My Jack Skellington....Richard looks like he's passed out on the floor in front
The kids with my folks
New Chewbacca shirt
Blanket for my parents
This track was a big hit
Finishing the day off trying out the the new cotton candy maker
Some of my favorite gifts :)

Thursday, December 10, 2015

I made It, I SHOULD be happy!

The picture above was taken kind of early in the morning, about 45 minutes until my big race.  As usual, my stomach was in knots, & I was dreading the first triathlon event...the swim. I never even swam the full amount I'd  be swimming until the day of the race.  Technically I had a year to train for this baby, so you'd think I would've been feeling pretty well prepared. But the training that started out with a bang,  fizzled toward the end when I realized just how many hours away from my family it would take to train really well.

 It's been a dream to do an Ironman distance for some years now.  I remember watching the Ironman on TV with my dad when I was younger, & seeing people after hours & hours out on the course coming into the finish dead tired, legs buckling, but happy.  For some weird reason that appeals to me.  I'm not crazy enough to do a full Ironman right off the bat though, this time I did the half Ironman distance.

Anyway, the race didn't turn out quite as planned, & they never quite do.  My friend who I had originally signed up with, wasn't able to do it for health reasons.  I always have a buddy, (friend or husband), in it with me.  So no one to grumble with, no one to encourage me or vice versa.  Even though I don't totally always stay with a partner throughout a whole race, it's nice to catch each other on the course & commiserate.  So this was just me.  Me talking to myself, me telling myself I am strong, me praying.

The weird thing is, I felt strong through out the whole race. I wasn't super speedy, but over all I felt good.  I didn't even have my usual bouts of cussing(a miracle in itself).  I was expecting it to be really hard for me, but I talked myself through it.  I talked to God a lot(you have many hours for that out on the course).  I'm so grateful I was able to make it!

But there is part of me that is so bothered by my overall time, the perfectionism seeped in, & sucked out some of my joy.  There was some confusion with the running course being not labeled well, & people telling me that you are supposed to do 2 loops, someone else told me 2 1/2, I also heard 3.  So I did what I thought was the correct amount, but it left me wondering if I over ran the course a bit? If other people were confused too(it seemed like it) & if they didn't run the full amount?  Not that I thought I was going to get an elite runners time, I was actually just feeling accomplished that I did it, then I looked up my score.  Probably shouldn't have looked! Anyway, I don't like it when I let little things eat at me that don't matter, I need to just focus on the fact that I reached a goal, & feel good about that

The thing that I realize, doing long races like this, is that I am strong.  This body I spent so many years hating, & trying to punish for not being what I thought it should be, is the one that keeps going & get's me to the finish line.  I am grateful for it, & that I'm getting more accepting of myself.

So, a really cool thing is that my 11 year old Sage did her first mini triathlon the day after my race. She did awesome!  She's not a swimmer & looked really worried as she tried to practice a bit in the lake before the race.  The water is like ice, & quite a shock when you have to put your face in.  When they started the race, I was so nervous for her, because I knew she was out of her element in the swim.  She pushed herself & got through it.  So proud of her for that!  Then of course she rocked the bike ride & run :)

                                    Glad it's over & grateful me made it!

Wednesday, December 2, 2015

Thankful For Warm Cars & Blankets

We had a very crisp & cold camping trip over Thanksgiving.  Cuyamaca State Park is beautiful, & there are so many hiking trails.  We got to go on a 4 mile hike with the kids to Stonewall Peak.  On the way up, it was lightly raining, then snowing, & total fog at the top.  I kind of felt like it was my Everest, when I got up there.  It cleared for a bit after we reached the highest point, & gave us a view of all the golden browns of the valley.  Thanksgiving day we made our feast as best we could with frozen hands trying to cook over our camping stoves, hoping the impending downpour would hold off...& it did until later that evening. Although, I can be a grumbler, & I eventually ended up sleeping in our van because I couldn't hack our damp tent any longer, I would totally do it again.  Loved seeing my kids so exciting about the light dusting of snow they got, & taking walks & seeing the wild turkeys each morning.  Thankful for times like these that we get to have :)