Some of my wounds are pretty much right on the surface. It's funny, I can work & work on something & then an innocent comment about my appearance sends me reeling. Maybe the progress is in how long it takes to recover?
No biggee, in conversation I was told that one daughter has more of my husband's body type, & the other daughter seems to have mine. Mine??? What did they mean by that? Which sent my head whirling, with memories of people's observations when I was a girl(that they felt the need to share) about my big calves, & being told I have chubby knees by a way older man when I was about 18. Why do some people feel they have the right to pick apart girls/women's bodies? There is a whole heap of those awful feelings from unsolicited comments(too many to share here), & never ever feeling good enough. Always feeling less than for this body.
I'm not a stick figure, my body type I don't think was meant to be. But I spent years trying to be that, & made myself so miserable.
5ft 2inches 117 lbs here....not huge by any standards, but I've felt apologetic about my body type in a way most of my life. Because being muscular, strong, solid was not good....I was born wrong, apparently I was supposed to look like a reed :)
I want to be fine with the way I look, so fine that comments from people don't sting, & send me into a tailspin. I'm still really working at it.
Haven't felt like I've had too much time to work on my art lately. I did repaint this girl above, that I made quite awhile back. Spruced her up a bit.
Love this below...so true, love to get lost in the making of something, all the other things slip away.
Been running trails & running the streets as usual. Sometimes my girls come along. Trying to increase my milage & prepare for another race.
Thursday, June 4, 2015
June. The days are lingering longer, I'm happy about that. Just a few more weeks until school is out & we hit the freedom of the open road. In other words, hours on end of family time, crammed together in a car. We are headed first to Wilsonville, OR(a suburb of Portland) to stay with one of my favorite friends. After a few days, & I'm sure wearing out our welcome at their place, we are headed to Olympia, WA. to visit 2 of the husband-man's sisters & families. On the way back home from all that, the plan is to stop for a couple nights in San Francisco.
I'm hoping to scope out a few areas in our travels, especially Portland area...look at a few houses for sale, just to see what's there. We are talking in the next year or so about trying to buy a place, or possibly build. My main requirement is land. I'm not a lady who cares about fancy kitchens, or walk-in closets. I need dirt to work in, I need trees. So we always go back & forth about trying to stay in sunny Southern California, where the prices are unfortunately sky high, or moving up north & getting way more for the money....but living in the dreaded rain.
Anyway, but I am getting ahead of myself. For now I'm just looking forward to an end of some school year obligations, & the adventure of not feeling as tied down to a schedule(I know it sounds pretty wild). ha ha